Prepare a reaction

Recently, Cindie told some people that we would soon be adopting a baby from Ethiopia. I should say that these people were young. Upon hearing this they did what many people do, which is play the “Stream of Consciousness” game.

This is where people try to say something that somehow relates to what they just heard. For instance, if you were told that I have an aunt who is a politician in Utica, MI, you might follow that comment with one of your own about a politician that you know, or something you know about Utica, MI.

I differentiate between the “Stream of Consciousness” game and conversation, because there is very little listening going on. There is no real desire to learn and discover who a person is. It is more a half-hearted attempt to get the attention back to self. (Am I being too cynical? I don't mean to be. I know I have been guilty of it too.)

Back to the story (and the point). Cindie tells these young people that we will be adopting a baby from Ethiopia. Their minds begin to spin, trying to conjure up something to add.

And what do they come up with? Ethiopia jokes. You know the ones. Like when someone pulls on either side of their neck and says, “What am I? I'm an Ethiopian choking a piece of rice.”

Now there a few reactions one could have to this. Self-righteous indignation would be pretty tempting. One of those starving little children is my daughter after all.

However, such indignation nation is hard to drum up, even from someone as self-righteous as me. There are two reasons for this. First, as an adolescent, I think I made the same jokes. The thought of it is so embarrassing that I'm strongly tempted to omit it. But it is almost certainly true, and that makes it too hard to maintain self-righteousness.

The second reason is good old fashioned befuddlement. Thinking of someone, actually a group of about 5 someones, being so ignorant and insensitive shocks me. The shock makes me laugh more than rage. I just can't wrap my head around it.

My main reaction to this is appreciation for what many have been telling me. Not all people will be as enlightened at all times as we might like them to be. I guess we should start preparing.

Process of the waiting list

I was curious to how the waiting list worked so I got in touch with our adoption agent and she explained it this way....

The way the list works is that you are added once your dossier is completed and reviewed by one of us. You guys officially started waiting on February 1st. When the care center takes in children, they get together the referral documents, do medical screening, get lab results, etc. Our staff in Ethiopia will send us the child's profiles by email. When we receive the profiles we look to our list for the first family open to that child's age/gender/background, etc. For example if we get a referral from Ethiopia of a boy who is 2.5 years old we may have to go towards the end of the list to find a family open to that age range and gender- so things don't always go in perfect order. Once we pair a family with a child we call their social worker, either your social worker or us will then call you with news of a referral and send you all the information by email.

There we have it, so start praying for some sweet little girls to come in so we can get our precious Ramiah home with her family!

Cindie

Nesting

Cindie writes:
We are still just in the waiting stage of the adoption, but it is like the nesting stage I went through when I was pregnant with the other two kids. I get to that point where I understand there is a new child coming into our life, then I FREAK! Or in other words, I am nesting. This is where I get the house ready for the new child, go on a throwing out bindge, organize most everything, and think of every little thing that needs to be fixed around the house and all the odd jobs just NEED to be done! I have multiple lists going.
I am excited for our life to be changed and our family to grow. Hannah went through all of her toys just the other day when I was organizing her room and wanted to get rid of some things! You gotta love this child. Anyway she was talking about where Ramiah would sleep, what clothes she would wear, and what toys she thought she would like. She is thrilled to have a sister and is anxiously awiting for her to come home as well.