Prepare a reaction

Recently, Cindie told some people that we would soon be adopting a baby from Ethiopia. I should say that these people were young. Upon hearing this they did what many people do, which is play the “Stream of Consciousness” game.

This is where people try to say something that somehow relates to what they just heard. For instance, if you were told that I have an aunt who is a politician in Utica, MI, you might follow that comment with one of your own about a politician that you know, or something you know about Utica, MI.

I differentiate between the “Stream of Consciousness” game and conversation, because there is very little listening going on. There is no real desire to learn and discover who a person is. It is more a half-hearted attempt to get the attention back to self. (Am I being too cynical? I don't mean to be. I know I have been guilty of it too.)

Back to the story (and the point). Cindie tells these young people that we will be adopting a baby from Ethiopia. Their minds begin to spin, trying to conjure up something to add.

And what do they come up with? Ethiopia jokes. You know the ones. Like when someone pulls on either side of their neck and says, “What am I? I'm an Ethiopian choking a piece of rice.”

Now there a few reactions one could have to this. Self-righteous indignation would be pretty tempting. One of those starving little children is my daughter after all.

However, such indignation nation is hard to drum up, even from someone as self-righteous as me. There are two reasons for this. First, as an adolescent, I think I made the same jokes. The thought of it is so embarrassing that I'm strongly tempted to omit it. But it is almost certainly true, and that makes it too hard to maintain self-righteousness.

The second reason is good old fashioned befuddlement. Thinking of someone, actually a group of about 5 someones, being so ignorant and insensitive shocks me. The shock makes me laugh more than rage. I just can't wrap my head around it.

My main reaction to this is appreciation for what many have been telling me. Not all people will be as enlightened at all times as we might like them to be. I guess we should start preparing.